“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” Dr. Seuss

Life is never black & white, but eight years ago we were touched by “it.” The contrasting colors caught our eyes and we were forever changed.  Tuxedo, the runt of the cat litter, had a lopsided “got milk” mustache, white booties and soul-loving pretty green eyes; the rest of his body was pitch black.  His brothers (there were three others) did not have any markings; so he was special from birth.

Tuxedo 1photoThere is no way to soften our hearts; he was put to rest Monday.  About a month ago, he was diagnosed with cancer of the kidneys.  He was given steroid shots to address his discomfort, but eventually that horrible disease took him from us.  Cancer… damn, damn, damn you!!!  We whispered to him in his final moments that we were deeply sorry having to make that decision for him.  We really, really hope he forgives us.  We like to think that we are of one thought when we told him that we did not want him to suffer. We could not bear the thought of him being in pain. No, not any animal.

We miss you.

Our emotions ebb and flow with a flood of tears and a down turn smile in its wake.  To lessen the pain Dr. Seuss  said, “Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened.” Didn’t Dr. Seuss like cats too?

We miss you.

Maralee_Park_071013_00450-EditIt will take time to adjust making one less bowl at dinner, or to call his name when something does not sound right in the house.

We miss you.

Tux Card 72Respectfully, we would like to continue, “Tuxedo, the Sophisticated Cat” blog in his memory with the same voice as in the past.  We know it denies his passing, but he was so special that we would like everyone to see the world through his voice.

We miss you.

Tux left us with a lesson that we will not forget– how to live.  As he lived a happy life, he died with dignity surrounded by his two favorite servants, mom and dad.

Tux, you are loved and missed.  By continuing this blog, we hope you bring joy to others as you have bought joy and love to us.

TuxWe love you sweet, sweet TUX.

Ms. Mar and Mr. C

This Post Has 83 Comments

  1. niasunset

    I am so sorry to hear this dear Maralee, how beautiful he was. They make us so sad when they gone. I remember always my other cat, he died because of cancer too. They are not in cat heaven together. Rest in peace lovely Tux, I loved you too even in your photographs…

  2. niasunset

    sorry should be “they are now in cat heaven…”

  3. We are so so sorry to read this.
    I am sure he understood and he probably took a little piece of your hearts with him but he is also leaving behind precious, wonderful memories.
    He is in peace now, free of any pain, and he had a life full of your love.
    We send lots of purrs and the humans send hugs

    1. Thank you, Texas. I know he is in peace and without pain and he will always be in our hearts. I have been overwhelmed by the support that I have received from the followers of your blog after you re-blogged. Thank you. It has been of great comfort.

  4. Judy Backlund

    That was so beautiful, Maralee. I am so sorry for your loss of Tux. We have some special kitties, too, that we hadn’t planned on. They become part of the family. Each loss is more difficult than the last. Tux and the others are so very lucky to have you and Clinton. My heart goes out to you. I remember when you first started your blog, I thought that Tux actually accompanied you on your trips. Kaye told me that Tux was sitting at home, not in the nap sack described. The personality you wrote about sounded like it was possible that he went along on some of your great adventures. Please know that I am keeping you and Clinton in my thoughts.
    Love, Judy

  5. Tazo

    Me loves & chirrups surround your family at this sad time. So sorry 🙁 X x

  6. Connie

    Of course he “forgives you”.. mostly because there is really nothing to forgive. He was in pain, and now he is not. I am sure he is sad that he is not with you in a form you both are familiar with and you recognize, but he is still with you.

    May you find peace during this difficult transition

    1. Thank you, Connie. Our pets are very special to us. I was reading your blog about fostering kitties. What a wonderful thing you do for them. Thank you.

  7. Sheila Morris

    I am so very very sorry for your loss and know you will always be grateful for Tux and his place in your family. I also appreciate knowing what you’ll do about his blog. It’s a thought I’ve had several times since The Red Man is 12 years old which is a long life for a Welsh terrier. I admire your carrying on. Bless all of your hearts today and in the days to come.

    1. Thank you, Sheila. Although his life was too short, Tux had a wonderful life with us. He will be missed but he will travel with us in his hearts.

  8. Janis Felidae

    I´m so sorry for your loss. I think you have made the right decision, though hard for you, but right for your precious one – he´s now running free and will not suffer any pain. I hope my huMum will do me this final gift of love when my time has come. I know she will always take me in her heart and I´m sure, Tuxedo knew you too carry him with you always and forever. I´m sending much love and purrs to you all xxx´s

    1. Thank you, Janice. It was the right decision, even it if is hard on us humans. He had the most wonderful and caring vet which made it a little easier.

  9. nancy

    What a gorgeous boy and such soulful eyes!

    We had to say good-bye to our beautiful tuxedo “Natasha” two months ago.She was an indoor cat and not quite six years old. We are still heart-broken and deeply empathize with your loss & grief. Many blessings to you and to Tux for the special years you had together. Remember: Tux is always with you.

    1. Thank you, Nancy. It’s hard to lose a kitty so young. Tux was just 7 years old and I had expected him to be with us for many years. I know Natasha will be in your hearts forever.

  10. Brian

    My sisters and I are so very sorry to hear about your dear Tux. We send you our best purrs, hugs and lots of love.

  11. That’s a hard thing I know. My wife and I have five cats which we love very much. I am sure the pain would be great if anything happened to any one of them. Our condolences to you and your family.

    1. Thank you, JK. We still have Tux’s 3 brothers and mother with us but Tux will always have a special place in our hearts.

  12. Katie Isabella

    I am so sorry and saddened and tearful that you lost your baby boy. They are babies to us in many ways and full family members. I know you are deeply saddened and will miss him for a long time to come but he is free now and you did the right thing.

  13. I am so sorry for your loss. But then, Tux will always be there in your hearts…he will live forever in your hearts, stories and pictures!

    1. Thank you so much. He will travel with us in our hearts always and have wonderful stories to tell.

  14. Animalcouriers

    Texas told us of your loss and we feel for you. It would be a disservice to Tux (and my, wasn’t he gorgeous) if you lose his voice now. Strength to you at this very difficult time.

  15. A Curious Cat

    So hard to say good-bye to a beloved pet. I feel your pain. Best wishes to you.

  16. onespoiledcat

    We read of Tux’s passing over the Bridge on our friend Texas’ blog this morning and just wanted to say we’re so sorry for your loss. The Bridge is a brighter place with your handsome Tux there. We know the sadness of missing his physical presence there with you can be overwhelming – continuing his blog is a lovely way to honor him. He’ll always be with you…..always.

    Hugs, Sammy and his Mom

    1. Thank you Sammy (and your mom). I’m sure Tux is frolicking with our dog Nicky. He will always be in our hearts.

  17. da tabbies o trout towne

    our good friend texas posted a message about your beautiful boy; we just wanted to stop by and offer a kind word of sympathy; it’s never an easy decision; letting them go; but please know if Tux could…speak…he’d not only say, THANX mom and dad….for everything…he’d also say…and I love you too..

    1. Thank you so much. As difficult as it was, I didn’t want him to suffer and I know he knew how much we loved him.

  18. Hot Rod Cowgirl

    I am so very sorry….my heart aches for what you are going through…I know how difficult it is to make the decision but you made the right choice and Tux knows that too…he is with God playing and being loved on and held for you until someday you will be with him again. In 2008 I had to make the choice to put down my 8 year old mare, Hobby…and then again the end of December we had to put down Kiah. Our animals are family…we love them so very much and they love us too…I know that Tux is thankful that he did not have to go through anymore pain and he knows how brave you are for helping him….he also would say I love you lots and lots and forever will:) I send you hugs of comfort and prayers that God would give you a picture of Tux in heaven. He will always be with you…hugs from HRCG and Minnie Mouse.

    1. Thank you so much. It’s never an easy decision or one we take lightly, but it was the best thing to do. I don’t want to see any animal (or human) suffer. He is in a better place along with our dog Nicky who passed away 7 years ago at age 16.

  19. Pit

    I can feel with you: sorry to hear of your loss.

  20. CATachresis

    I read about the passing of dear Tuxedo on Texas’ blog and just came to say how sorry I am for your loss. He was obviously a joy and your memories will be bitter sweet at first but eventually the sweet overtakes the bitter! Hold on to them and I agree this blog should be kept in his memory xx

    1. Thank you so much. We have many great memories of Tux and he will always be in our hearts.

  21. Dianda

    So sorry to hear about Tuxedo. He will be greatly missed, but never forgotten. I hope you and your family will be okay.

  22. Eric and Flynn

    Tuxedo was a handsome boy.We are so sorry to hear of your loss, and send you our consoling purrs.

  23. aimee

    My heart aches for you…I am so sorry.

  24. I’m sorry about your lost of Tuxedo. He was beautiful and I’m sorry I haven’t met him before. Take care!

    1. Thank you so much. What a beautiful kitty Little Binky is. He knew how to find the right home.

  25. Pootle

    I’m so very very sorry 🙁 thinking of you hugs xxx

  26. That is so sad that Tuxedo is no longer with you. He looks like he was nothing but a bundle of love. Hopefully you’ll consider a younger version of Tux to keep your home bright.

    1. Thank you, Bella. He was a bundle of love. We still have his three brothers to keep our house bright and they will always remind us of Tux. (Tux was so much more well behaved than his brothers. :-))

  27. Ms. Mar and Mr. C – my furry love of life, Teddy B. and I wish to let you know how sorry we are to hear of the passing of Tux. He was a beautiful cat and very lucky to have a family that loved him so! Cheers to Tux.

  28. LP

    We heard through Texas that you had lost your beautiful and dear cat, Tux. We know how difficult it is to make the decision to let them go , having had to do it ourselves. Please be comforted by the fact that he is no longer suffering unnecessarily.I truly believe animals don’t understand why they are in pain and so the kindness thing to do is to not permit them to suffer. We can see that Tux was loved and very well taken care of. He had a family and friends who loved him. Please take comfort in knowing that his life with you , was the very best life he could ever have had .

    the critters in the cottage xo

    1. Thank you, LP. We had a wonderful veterinarian who helped us through all of this. As she would would say, Tux didn’t know he had cancer. If he woke up feeling good, that was a good day. But when it comes to a time where they’re not feeling good, it’s no longer a good day for them. Tux didn’t have any more good days left so it was time. He was loved and he will be missed, but we have the wonderful memories.

  29. meowmeowmans

    I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for loving Tuxedo so much, and so well. Purrs and prayers to you.

  30. catnipoflife

    It is hard to know what to say in times such as these. Our pets become our children and tug at our hearts on a daily basis with their antics and love. Our Tuxedo was stolen from us so we have never felt closure on that loss. Our previous Dock passed much the same as your Tux, not the cancer, but kidney failure. It was difficult but better that watching him suffer. My heart goes out to you…purr-r-r-r

    1. Thank you, Catnip. I’m sorry to hear about your Tuxedo and Dock. Tux’s kidneys ultimately failed as a result of the cancer. It’s never any easy thing to do, but it is the right thing.

  31. Maggie

    I’m so very sorry to hear about Tuxedo.
    Beautiful cat. They touch our lives with their sweetness and quirks.
    hugs and purrs from us

    1. Thank you, Maggie. Tux had one quirk that always amused us. He had silent purrrs. He’d look at you and open his mouth like he was going to say something, and nothing would come out. And he was the only cat who would answer to his name.

  32. We are so sorry to hear the news about Tux. Send healing purrs at this time of loss.

  33. I came over from Texas, a cat in New York blog. I am so sorry about your beautiful Tux. He was one of the lucky kitties, loved and respected all his life and then at the end as you say was allowed to die in dignity with the people he loved. All kitties should live their lives this way. The Dr. Suess quote, perfect! I am sure he is tucked close to your heart.

    1. Thank you so much. He was a lucky kitty and we were lucky to have him as a part of our life.

  34. I did know Tux. I came over from Texas, my good furriend. We are so sad to learn he went OTRB….but the quote says it all…be so purrleased he came through your life. He is waiting….paw pats, Savannah

  35. Hi. We saw your post about Tux on Texas, a Cat in NY’s blog and had to write. We are two adopted kitties and we love meeting humans that love fur people. Hemingway here…..I’m a tuxedo cat and Mom was amazed by my colors so she adopted me. I know how hard it is for humans to lose their fur people. Mom has gone through that and she still cries, but she has also told us that each fur person has a special place in her heart and there always seems to be room for more. We’re sorry that Tux is gone but you obviously gave him a wonderful life and he’s probably telling everyone about that now.

  36. rubicorno

    I am sorry for your loss, Maralee, Tux was a gorgeous cat and I know how it feels in these moments, I had a number of cats that brought light to my life.

  37. Sid Dunnebacke

    I saw mention Tuxedo’s leaving in your comment at Dianda’s blog, and had to come over to offer more solidarity for you. I’ve lost two cats, one in circumstances similar to Tux’s, and in no situation is saying goodbye to them fun. Still, this is beautifully written – certainly because it’s so heartfelt. Absolutely Dr. Seuss is right, but it’s not easy is it?

  38. wildinthepryors

    I am so sorry for you lost. I have been owned by many pets over the years, and each one has been a member of our family. It never is easy to loose a member of the family. Their lives are much too short.

  39. kerryl29

    I’m extremely late, but no less sincere in my condolences. I’ve been through this with my cats more times than I care to count (most recently about a month ago) and it never gets any easier.

    Please accept my sympathies.

  40. Travel Spirit

    I was going to comment how beautiful Tux is and saw that he passed back in the Spring. So sorry!

  41. oneofhere

    Dear Maralee, hope that by now your days are much brighter again. In February we had to redeem our dear cat Nino, too, after he has suffered a few days from a failing liver – with less than four years old and perfect weight. The words of your vet are very wise, we would have liked to know them that time. It did give some comfort to us that “the needle can be the greatest proof of love that you can give to your beloved pet.” Nino was beyond any recovery so we went this path. Now we have got a new cat, Jojo, eleven months old now. He is quite a nasty boy but a sunshine as well. We do not forget our Nino and to remember what had happened may hurt a bit these days, too. But we get on fine and this we wish you, too.

    1. Thank you very much for your kind thoughts. Time does heal all wounds, but we will never forget.

  42. lillymilly007

    I am so very very sorry for Tux! We just adopted a tuxedo few months ago. Since then I am planning of illustrating a book about her and how she take care of us all!
    I think Tux would be happy is someday you’ll adopt a tuxedo again!

  43. Cornel A.

    I didn’t know this…
    I am sorry.

    Last year I lost my dog in a car accident and I suffered a lot… so I understand you very well.
    But, as you say, we must be thankful for all we had or we have.

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